Candy Channel in Child Porno Controversy

Well it doesn't seem possible, does it, but the totally innocent picture on Candy Channel's album cover has got 10 of the CDs impounded by the Dutch customs. Believing them to be CD roms of child pornography, an over-zealous customs official decided to hang on to them for six weeks. It was only when the intended recipient, Johan Keijser of Dynatrax International, decided to go down the customs in person and vouch for the CDs that they would finally let him have them.

Sherrie and Old Bangers

Sherrie drives old bangers, and the vehicles always seem to have lives of their own. "I used to own a band van which finally 'died' and went to the scrappy. About 6 months later, on New Years Day of all days, I was lying in bed dreaming when someone thundered so hard on my front door I thought they were going to break it. Well, it was the police. I let them in and they asked me if I still had the van as I was still the registered owner. It transpired that the old van had been used in connection with several robberies in the West Midlands! Another car I owned I sold to Duke (who drives even older bangers than I do) and it caught fire with him and all his equipment in. I thought I was going to have to find a new lyricist but Duke managed to get himself and everything out okay before the fire brigade turned up. People were trying to drag him away from the burning car as he was getting the equipment out but let's face it, his Musicman bass is worth dying for! More recently the landlord at a pub gig offered me £50 for my Fiesta 1.3. Apparently this is a model which is much in demand locally as a grass track racing car! I'm happy cos that car has gone to a good home now, to John's friend Guy. I hope they have happy times together."

Duke's First Gig

My first gig was at a school disco and we didn't have a mic or p.a. so we stole one of those crappy carbon mics out of a telephone handset and made a sort of cone shape out of cardboard, cornflake box, I think, that almost fitted it then sellotaped it in so the singer (me! I couldn't play well enough for the guys to risk letting me loose on guitar in public in those days, well the world wasn't ready for it really. Come to think of it, probably still isn't but hasn't any choice nowadays) well I sort of had something vaguely resembling a hand held mic to clutch during the performance. OK it looked more like a Cornetto than a mic, but it was fairly dark you know :- moody stage lighting etc. and not too many people watching closely 'cos the boys were too busy trying to grope the girls and the girls were too busy saying YUK and fighting them off. We hooked our cornetto 'mic' up to a guitar amp and it sorta worked, but was horribly distorted and required me to shout at full belt in order to make any sort of volume. Partway through the gig the bloody thing disintegrated in me fist 'cos the sellotape couldn't hack the sweaty heat. By then I was hoarse and you couldn't hear me anyway. Yeah, stardom. I kept the show going by jumping around a lot and pulling faces. If in doubt, clown about.
Oh, I nearly forgot, the bass player was pissed and fell off the stage, so we had to stop and carry him to first aid (the bogs). That worried us a bit 'cos we were all underage and shouldn't have been in the pub beforehand anyway. So we didn't go back on and that was that. First gig over. Makes you wonder why I chose this as my life's work!? Don't do it unless you're absolutely barking, that's what I say. All the guys with any sense were out there trying to grope the girls. They still are.